The long awaited debut LP from NYC’s FLOWER “Hardly A Dream” is finally set to arrive.
FLOWER’s tedious approach to writing/creating/drawing their debut LP was carefully thought out and the result is a monumental anarcho punk /crust record.
“Hardly A Dream” Takes us on a bleak journey through the dark side of society. As soon as you drop the needle a dark atmosphere is immediately created with a slow intro featuring arpeggio guitar work that builds into pummeling d-beat crust. The albums vocals then leave you with a feeling of being crushed by the ever-present weight of living through our modern world of late stage capitalism that was built on the falsehoods of the so called American dream, religious hypocrisy’s, nationalism, and the greed of humankind.
FLOWER take many cues from predecessors and are most often (and rightfully so) compared to NAUSEA but they also take a heavy influence from ANTISECT, SACRILEGE & other greats. The artwork has a very RUDIMENTARY PENI feel and the record comes with an amazing 24.5 X 34.75 CRASS style poster jacket. All art work was meticulously hand drawn and overseen by the guitarist Willow in true DIY style and spirit. Willow was also cool enough to draw up a special shirt for the record release featuring an alternative PROFANE EXISTENCE backprint!
Dark, heavy, galloping crust from the streets of London. AGNOSY is back to present us with a ferocious beast of an album that can only be forged by the anger and frustration of living in today’s world. “When Daylight Reveals The Torture” aggressively attacks evils such the current rise of fascism and animal abuse. It intelligently and passionately touches on the Afrin invasion and the revolution in Rojava and shows nothing but utter disgust toward the arrogance of humankind’s lust for greed and power that will inevitably lead us down paths of war and environmental devastation.
AGNOSY – Live at SCUMFEST in London. 2011
While lyrically AGNOSY are much more politicly straight forward this time around than on previous releases, musically they have expanded on their sound to create a dark and moody atmosphere while at the same time staying crust as fuck. To say they know what they are doing would be an understatement from this band of vets whose members have played in HIATUS, HEALTH HAZARD, and BEGINNING OF THE END.
Long galloping intros are followed up by traditional d-beat, fierce solo’s are then meet with vicious vocals and pulverizing bass in a brilliant recording captured by Lewis Johns at The Ranch Production House and was mastered by Brad Boatright at Portland’s legendary Audiosiege. We then pressed on deluxe heavyweight 150-gram vinyl, printed on reverse board jackets, and included an 11in x 22in gatefold insert to bring you a high quality and truly epic record.
PROFANE EXISTENCE – PO BOX 647 – HUNTINGTON WV – 25711 – UNITED STATES
The legendary crust classic is now available once again!
Authorized and released in cooperation with MISERY, S.D.S., & MCR Japan & Remastered by Jack Butcher at Enormous Door Studio we are beyond proud to make one one the most rare and sought after crust records available once again.
Fuck the scavengers charging punks exuberant amounts of cash on ebay and discogs. We worked meticulously with both bands and with Jack at Enormous door to bring you an updated version that kicks major audio ass while maintaining the original authenticity.
Released on deluxe 150 gram vinyl. With an 11×11 inner sleeve. Black Paper Jacket. Reverse Board Jacket.
Earlier this year we re-issued this legendary LP and sold over 950 copies in just 4 short months. For this second pressing we pressed 490 copies on Krystal Clear & 485 on Grey Vinyl with Black Mist.
Crystal Clear (Bullet belt no included) Grey With Black Mist (Bullet belt no included) PROFANE EXISTENCE – PO BOX 647 – HUNTINGTON WV – 25711 UNITED STATES
Stench crust the way it was meant to be played!
The UK crust scene of the 1980’s inspired band after band but no other band has ever reincarnated the sound of that time as well as SWORDWIELDER. Quite simply if you like crust, then this the album you have waited decades for.
Review by Craig Hayes from “Your Last Rites”… Swordwielder – System Overlord Heavyweight punk fanatics take note: System Overlord is a fucking triumph. The long-awaited sophomore album from Gothenburg stenchcore band Swordwielder is a brooding behemoth, constructed from the filthiest and heftiest strains of punk and metal. System Overlord shimmers with apocalyptic visions, and it’s overflowing with all the grim atmospherics and intimidating intensity that defines consummate crushing crust.
Too much hype? No way… And no apologies, either. Swordwielder deal in definitive stenchcore on System Overlord, and much like their full-length debut, 2013’s Grim Visions of Battle, the band’s latest release is a knockout. Swordwielder’s harsh, gruff and dark sound owes a significant debt to old school icons like Amebix, Axegrinder, Deviated Instinct, and Antisect, and they mix and mangle their influences and leave ’em to rot on the battlefield.
Plenty of hammering rage drives System Overlord tracks like “Violent Revolution,” “Savage Execution” and “Cyborgs,” and thundering epics like “Corrupt Future” and “Northern Lights” exhibit subtler strengths, mixing guttural growls and clean vocals with crashing percussion and dirge-laden riffs. Connoisseurs of corpse-dragging crust will love the brute-force belligerence of “Absolute Fear,” “Nuclear Winter,” and “Second Attack,” which rain down like merciless mortar barrages. As a rule, all of System Overlord‘s mammoth tracks chug and churn with grinding muscle, while reeking of squalor and decay.
Swordwielder exudes tightly coiled aggression from start to finish here—songs rise from the ashes of desolation, and resounding calls for action and resistance ring loud. If you’re a fan of heavy-hitters like Fatum, War//Plague, Carnage, Zygome, Cancer Spreading or (insert your favorite hefty crust crew here), System Overlord‘s trampling tempo and strapping sound are bound to appeal.
WILT combine old school metal and crust in a perfect hybrid that very few others have ever achieved. Prepare for a LP thats equal parts galloping d-beat crust reminiscent of bands like HELLSHOCK, and INSTINCT OF SURVIVAL, meets old school death metal in the vein of BOLT THROWER, MEMORIAM (old) SEPULTURA.
Here is a track from the upcoming LP
“Sermon for the Bootlickers”
Despite the inculcation of helplessness within each there remains great power. Ill at ease with such makes us ill. Learn to see the hand that feeds for what it is. You’ve been fooled if you think you’ve got no power. Refuse to be reduced to a consumer you’re a human being. Define yourself by more than wealth. Define yourself as a human. You don’t need what you’re being sold. Bend your knee to no authority but your own mind. You have the power to avoid the gilded trap. Avarice is what you’re conditioned for. Break the mold discover what’s really valuable to you.
WILT will be on in Europe this July / August will ELECTROZOMBIES From Chile
Wed, July 12 Hanover / Germany / Confirmed Thu, July 13 Bremen Fri, July 14 Mulhem / Germany / Confirmed Sat, July 15 Gent, Belgium / CrustPicnic / Confirmed Sun, July 16 Paris / France or Amsterdam / Nederland July 18 North-East France or West Germany July 19 Freiburg / Germany TBC July 20 Winterthur / Switzerland Fri, July 21 Zurich / Switzerland Sat, July 22 Biel / Switzerland July 23 Lausanne or Geneva / Switzerland
July 24 Geneva / Switzerland or Grenoble france
July 25 Treviso (or Milano or Bologna or Verona) / Italy
July 26 Ljubljana Slovenia Confirmed
July 27 No Sanctuary chilling day
Fri, July 28 NoSanctuary Confirmed
Sat, July 29 NoSanctuary Confirmed
July 30 Ilirska Bistrica/Slovenia or Vienna/Austria or Budapest/Hungary.
July 31 Wiena / Austrai or Budapest or / Slovakia
August 1 Brno / Czech Republic.
August 2 Prague / Czech Republic
August 3 Finsterwalde / Germany TBC
Fri, August 4 Leipzig / Germany TBC
Sat, August 5 Berlin / Germany / confirmed
August 6 Dresden
August 7 Wroclaw / Poland
August 8 Warsaw / Poland
August 9 Poznan / Poland
August 10 Szczecin/Poland TBC
Fri, August 11 Rostock / confirmed
Sat, August 12 Hamburg TBC
For this in the Seattle or surrounding area you can catch WILT this Saturday April first at Highline Bar with NOOTHGRUSH from Oakland.
You’ve been hiding under a rock? Maybe you been on the moon? Blatant Toys ‘R’ Us reference for the 80s kids. Are you that jerk that drinks outside and only goes in when you friend’s band is playing? These are the only reason you wouldn’t know who A.T.U. are. This cd doesn’t need to be reviewed again here, but it hit my mailbox so I’ll just add my two cents. Funny thing is, the cd player in my car would only work once every 20 or so tries and finally shit the bed when my original copy of this was in it. I actually had to physically remove the cd player and pry the A.T.U. disc out of it(leaving many horrible scratches) and replace the cd player. Fortunately I got this copy not too long after. I don’t know if this is the newly remastered copy, but I feel like it might be. The fact that the track list has a numbering discrepancy leads me to believe it might be(unless it’s just a printing error)…and the lack of awesome flaming jug sticker. Anyway…this band completely embodies everything that i love in a punk band: a fierce political agenda with no apologies and great writing. Not to mention the nice thick booklet that comes with it that has both the lyrics and explanations, plus lots of pictures. While they do cover issues that are generally covered by every other band, A.T.U. are different in their approach, and they hit local issues as well, such mountain top removal coal mining. Also, their zeal for the legalization of hemp(non drug) and cannabis deserve massive applause. Whether or not you smoke, the facts behind cannabis for medical use can’t be ignored and legalizing hemp could possibly slow climate change by leaps and bounds. Oh, and it does less damage that booze when smoked for fun, so I’ve heard(nudge nudge, wink wink, know what I mean?). Throw in sound bites from Amy Goodman and seamless progressions accompanied by Sarah’s spoken political bits that remind me of bands like OI POLLOI and CONFLICT. Please buy this for yourself, your friends, siblings and maybe a copy for local authority figures. APPALACHIAN TERROR UNIT is one of the most important punk bands in existence today. (Jake)
Profane Existence Records / P.O. Box 18051 / Minneapolis, MN 55418
This is from a library of podcasts that I did a while back, but lost all links to them when PE changed formats. I’ll load up the entire list as time goes on. Cheers!
Track list –
Suffer
Instinct of Survival
Nerves
Gloom
Insurgence
Red Flag 77
Zygote
Submachine
Born Dead Icons
Jonestown
Filth
Vicious Circle
Servitude
Guided Cradle
Unhinged
Econochrist
Punk bands tour the world singing anthems that promote militant direct action & activism, putting out albums with flaming Molotovs emblazoned across their covers, with militant messages; but few of us ever truly put those words into action. Walter Bond on the other hand has spent decades working tirelessly, whether leafleting at shows and in the streets, tabling at Pride events, protesting, or volunteering at animal sanctuaries before finally turning to the more militant tactics of the Animal Liberation Front. Walter is a proud anarchist, Vegan, of Latino heritage, who identifies as bisexual. He also is currently a prisoner in one of the most controversial and restrictive prisons in the USA today.
I have been writing to Walter in prison since he was first arrested 2 years ago, after his brother snitched him out. At the time of his arrest, Walter was living on the streets while attacking businesses that profit from animal exploitation.
PE: – You identified as an anarchist for most of your life. Can you tell us what being an anarchist means to you, and how it connects with Animal Liberation, and Total Liberation?
Walter Bond at the CMU
WALTER: When I was in 7th grade in 1989 I used to make all kinds of clip art fliers with my friends under the name ‘Anti-Statist Counter Culture’. We would distribute them mostly to local corporate businesses and churches in the area, mostly to agitate. By the end of 8th grade I had completely dropped out of school and was living this nihilist lifestyle and was just very reactionary and angry at the whole world, parents, school, everything! Back then I was dealing with a world of shit that was to much for me to handle. I turned to drug abuse and vandalism as an outlet. Anarchism back then was a personal vendetta I had about how my life and the world around me was and how I felt it should be.
I wasn’t alone. I had three other very close friends that felt the same. Two of them connected with some gutter punks in Boulder, Colorado and ran away to Hollywood, California. 25 years later one of them is a vocalist for a grind core band, and another is a bicycle maker that lives in a squat in New York City and gets harassed whenever he tries to leave the country because he has bee
n on federal watch lists since the 90’s.
Today anarchism is firmly connected to my activism. The Animal Liberation Front has been an anarchistic dis-organization since its inception. There is no way for business-as-usual and Animal Liberation to co-exist in any fashion that is effective for the goals and interests of either side. Business, consumerism and corporations ultimately care about whatever is profitable. Their raw materials are the blood and bones of Animals and the life’s’ blood and guts of the Earth, which is the fountain head of all life. It’s difficult to make this connection as just a foodie Vegan but once you spend some time in the activist world, it’s an unavoidable clash.
Anarchism is in opposition to State control, corporate domination, class privilege, oppression of one group by another. These are the identical ideals fought for by Animal Liberation abolitionists, just applied to different objectives. I think that anarchism and Animal liberation from the abolitionist or radical perspective are an organic pairing. What good would it do to establish a human society of free communities only to destroy the planet with a McDonalized diet or a mass addiction to industrialization? The reality is that there are billions of people on the planet! With or without government or state authority, industry is going to continue destroying the Earth. It doesn’t matter who turns on the machines everyday, because things are not made out of no things. And history has proven time and time again that if we do not remove the oppressions of the least defensible of us then the circle of abuse begins again with a brand new name.
PE: – You are an Animal Liberation POW, and you also hold anti-civ views, and have a critique of technology. I see a lot of overlap between the anarcho-primitivist critique of domestication, and mass society, with the views of Total Liberation. Do you feel there is a contradiction there? Or how do you see them fitting together?
WALTER: I definitely am not a fan of technologically advanced civilization. From the industrial age forward what we are really looking at is a lattice work infrastructure, put in place by governments of men to subjugate women, the poor, Animals, Earth, labor and each other according to Ethnicity, nationalism, class, gender and economics. Since the age of the machine and science; pain, suffering, war and murder have been greatly, incredibly and insanely quickened!
Despite all the promises of making things better we are blowing mountains in half to get at their coal. We are chopping down every forest on Earth. We are dropping bombs on civilians from remote control airplanes; we are mechanically murdering billions of Animals at the expense of the natural world. We are wasting mass amounts of crop, soil, and water, all euphemisms for Earth, so that we can eat cheap burgers. Thanks to constant technological crutches most adults cannot listen to, follow or remember simple directions. Meanwhile paranoia and random acts of violence are at an all time high!
It is time to stop pretending that we don’t see the writing on the wall. Technology kills! And that is most often its primary use. WE HAVE ENOUGH NUCLEAR WARHEADS ON THIS PLANET TO KILL ALL LIFE SEVERAL TIMES OVER, BUT WE CANNOT EVEN SAVE OUR OWN SPECIES ONCE. I used to build slaughterhouses for a living and I can tell you from first hand experience that it’s not physically possible to butcher tens of thousands of Animals a day without an abundance of mechanical aid. Just like it is not possible to destroy a forest without first building roads and inlets to get yellow death machines into the area.
art off Walter Bond support page
No machine is morally neutral when it’s sole design and intent is to eviscerate, vivisect, slash cut and transport the splintered, destroyed and devastated remains of the biosphere! The technologies we use to heal the sick and, lessen pain and suffering and generally make the human world a more comfortable place are scant in comparison to the damage done. But just like any alcoholic or drug addict we exaggerate the pay off we get while greatly ignoring the damage it takes to pay for it. And just as with any other addiction the truly terrible thing is how many other innocent lives have become ruined in the addicts wake.
Politics would have us believe the modes of production are neither beneficial nor harmful but only in the right or wrong hands. Yet time and time again his-story has shown that whether the factory is run by greedy capitalists or free thinking anarcho-communists, the machines still get turned on and the raw materials of industry are still the blood and guts of the Earth and her Animal Nations! In truth, who controls the means and modes of production is of concern to those who labor and profit by and for the machines, with little to no concern for the connectivity of all life, or the world.
As far as how I view the connectivity, or lack thereof of ideas like Total liberation and anarcho-primitivism I guess I view it as parallel. In my estimation Total Liberation should be making steps to unite various struggles in the real world against the common leviathan of government and towards the reality of free communities. Unfortunately, I don’t see much grassroots organization around Total Lib. it remains, thus far, in the world of ideas, of salutations of solidarity. I think the occupy movement started out with a truly unifying Total Liberation tactic and showed the tremendous power of coming together. But there has to be an escalation of tactics at the helm or else all is eventually kaput. I’m not trying to be smug here but where is Total Liberation physically? Ideally Total Liberation should be a bridge building movement to unite activists of all liberation struggles be they human, Earth or Animal. That is a huge amount of work. And honestly it’s an abundance of work I seldom see getting done. No one wants to yield or compromise enough to make a true united liberation front possible. Or as radicals we use total lib as a pretext to ideological recruitment of other radicals.
Anarcho-primitivism on the other hand is really against the entire foundation of what our modern ‘civilized’ oppressions are built upon. As such it’s not very activist friendly. I mean, you don’t protest civilization with a sign. The idea of a truly clean slate is far to radical for that. The only way to effectively protest technology, mass society, domestication and their ilk is for you yourself to become a wild child and destroy the machines. But Total Liberation and anarcho-primitivism are for ever united by the same objective. That being the complete escape from tyranny and oppression for as many lives, and ways of life as can exist without any oppressing the other. One is just dedicated to aligning forces in the here and now, while the other is looking at how we will have to not only get rid of the road we are on, but also get rid of the road.
PE: – It almost seems like there was a Class Warfare element to the choices you made when selecting your targets. Was this intentional?
WALTER:– You are the first person to ever ask me this question, and the answer is yes. There were a couple different messages to my arsons beyond Animal Liberation, one was classism. Every place I hit was not what society would try to justify as ‘necessary’ Animal cruelty. Each place in its own right was of service to the upper middle, to the rich echelon of society. Whether for fashion, hobby or delicacy I wasn’t going after stores in the hood or ethnic communities. I was after retailers that sold dead Animals’ broken bodies or skins purely for consumer pleasure.
Another thing I have heard grumbles about is why I went after soft targets instead of more strategic targeting. There was a subtle reason behind this as well. As an activist I often saw people pass the buck when it comes to Animal industries. The wholesalers and retailers always blame it on the public. If no one bought their products they wouldn’t sell them. Or since there is a demand someone is going to fill it whether them or someone else. The consumers always hide in numbers. They don’t feel responsible because there not buying anything that’s not being bought a million times over by others. The drop in the bucket syndrome. If you pick on them you will instantly be accused of targeting specific groups of people. And after all it’s really the evil corporations fault for putting such cruelly produced products on the market.
I burned three businesses right in the middle of major cities. I did not want to hide my ALF actions the way Animal cruelty is hidden. I wanted every retailer and consumer to see that when you deal in product of death you shouldn’t be surprised when retribution finds its way to your doorstep. Honestly, if I would have had more resources or help I would have done live Liberations unfortunately this was not a viable option. But the only good thing about living in a non-Vegan world is that if you want to combat cruelty you never have to go far. You don’t need to have a bunch of money or go to some clandestine trading camp to make an impact.
The Sheepskin Factory Walter shut down
Most of the time people like to imagine that their heroes have all this expertise that they never could. It’s a convenient belief because otherwise they wouldn’t have any excuse for putting their own self-interest, fear and apathy above doing in their hearts what they know must be done. The truth is when it comes to Animal exploitation or the destruction of the Earth, no one is innocent. Not Vegans, or cadaver munchers. Not anarchists, or capitalists. Not me, or you. We are all shades of red as Screaming Wolf once wrote in the seminal book ‘Declaration of War’. We lessen our shade of red with our lifestyles and our actions. And this is our obligation if we have compassion. Not from some outside authority but from inside ourselves, our consciousness.
PE: – Recently you completely changed your position on abortion, what prompted this seemingly sudden shift?
WALTER:– What prompted this change of heart is a growing disenchantment with so-called conservative views. And the pompous attitudes that produce them. I have never been involved in any anti-abortion activism, just so people know. In the hundreds of pages that I have written in the last 3 years I have written approximately one paragraph about the ‘pro-life’ views I once held. I just want to set it straight from the beginning that I am not some reformed anti-abortion extremist. That said, I once held an obscure view on abortion that was part of a conservative clique within the Straight Edge movement of the 1990’s.
My limited comprehension of abortion as an issue was from this two dimensional idea that ‘if I am going to care deeply about the rights of shrimp, then I should care about the rights of a fetus’. This was a complete absent reference to the fact that this whole issue takes place inside a woman’s body and that there is a more complex issue of rights to be observed. Not just vegan hardline consistency.
I have recently begun to educate myself on feminism and in particular anarcha-feminism. The more I learn the more I feel like an ass for having displayed such an idiotic and disconnected view of abortion in the first place. From an Animal Liberation perspective which is more my field, it must be said that humanity is the cause of extreme amounts of suffering to billions of Animals annually, for food vivisection, entertainment and beyond. Ultra-consumpive societies like north America, china and now India are currently decimating the Earth like a cancer! In this war on nature humans are a tyrannical and abusive enemy. I stand on the side of the Animal Nations and Mother Earth, I am a species traitor. And human birth control is a relief to the planet!
But as I was saying, what prompted me to finally take a long look at my beliefs, not only on abortion but many of my moralist attitudes in general are my surroundings. For those that do not know I am a prisoner of war, inside a political prison, within a prison. On this unit of 40 men, I never leave, and I am housed here for an indefinite remainder of my prison sentence. Most of the men here are orthodox Muslims; with a sprinkling of those god bless America type of militia, Ron Paul weirdoes. It’s a super conservative and religious environment. I have learned first hand what dogma and so-called conservativism leads people too. Mainly, bigotry, homophobia, and close-mindedness.
PE: – When you held anti-abortion views, it seemed like most of your criticism was directed towards the medical industries. This brings up the question of herbal abortion as a non-medical alternative. Was this something you had considered?
WALTER:– No it was not. But I am not more for one method than another. It’s not my business how women decide to abort, control birth or exercise autonomy over their own bodies. As a man, I am not only never going to be in their position but I am never going to put a woman in that predicament either. I have no children, and the first thing I am going to do upon release, which is years from now, will be to go to the hospital and get myself fixed. Furthermore, no woman anywhere should feel ostracized or shamed for her decision to exercise her reproductive rights be it herbally, or in a clinic.
PE: – Author Peter Gelderloos once wrote that anarchy and colonialism need to be made completely incompatible. Cultural approbation of indigenous art, spirituality, and cultural traditions is a major problem in many subcultures today. I want to ask about your face tattoo. I know it means a lot to you, but is your tattoo an appropriation of Maori Moko?
WALTER:– I have a few supporters from New Zealand and have been questioned about this by a couple different Maori. One told me that the design I have would better be suited as part of a leg piece, and the other argued that it was a handsome piece for Moko, but wanted to know why I don’t have the rest of my face done. But the truth is that while I definitely used the style of traditional Maori, my tattoo artist and I made absolutely sure that we were not replicating any traditional or current Maori designs.
I have also been locked up with a Maori guy and several tanga, Samoa and Polynesian islanders. Everyone has been cool with it mainly because I am of Island descent. My mother is Taino. For those that don’t know these are the indigenous people of Puerto Rico. This coupled with the fact that I am in prison for fighting for a cause seem to have earned me the respect of other islanders. The general vibe I get is relief that I take warrior hood seriously and am not just trying to look hardcore for my white friends in the suburbs.
I plan on getting the rest of my face tattooed when I get out of prison along with the rest of my body. That said I never promote it as something others should do. Getting a large face tattoo is serious business and can have serious repercussions. And It has intense personal meaning to me. It was a life changing event, it literally changed my personality. Some would say pushed me over the edge.
And yes, appropriation of indigenous cultures is an epidemic problem. In many larger ways than a very few people getting face tats. Here in the United States every white person wants to pretend they are part native. Out of some feelings of white guilt. Instead of helping the decimated Indian population. They shove real natives onto reservations to starve and die while pretending to be the real deal. Honestly, this makes me sick
PE: – Most of the businesses you targeted reopened and continue to make profits even though you did extensive damage. In light of this do you think your actions were effective? Could you have been more strategic? If so how?
WALTER:– The way I look at it I could have spent everyday of my life standing in front of those businesses holding a sign and I would have never cost them one penny. Even when I used to volunteer my time helping actual Animals it would occur to me that I was still having a negative impact against the industries of Animal exploitation. Even with Veganism, I am one of the few Animal Liberation abolitionist Vegans you will hear admit that my diet is not saving 90 Animals a year. So there I was living as ethical as I could, helping Animals and talking with and educating people. All the while all I am seeing is negative impact. I have friends that have been holding signs and tabling for decades, negative impact. Why is activism always geared to just lessen our roll in the cruelty but never to fight it? Negative impact.
artwork off Walter Bond’s support page
I got fed up with it. All the -more-Vegan-than-thou- conversations that I had at every coffee shop in Denver. Always playing supplicant to people. Practically begging people to care. Then I woke up one day and it hit me. I was a utopianist, I was deluded. I, as most overly idealistic people really believed that deep down everyone was like me. I was once one of them, hell; I even used to build slaughterhouses! If I can change, anyone can, right? Wrong.
I came to the conclusion that most people don’t want to change, most people don’t want to learn what’s going on with Animals because they don’t want to feel bad or responsible for it, and most people are not going to sacrifice their time energy or money to make a change. BAM! The facts, welcome to reality! All that was left in my life was to fight back on the Animals behalf of shut up because I was sick of the sound of my own voice.
And you know what I didn’t change the world. But I did something that I never was able to before. I cost the Animal abuse industries about two and a half million bucks, positive effect! And with every defiant step forward that I took, I inspired. By my count there were eight international underground acts of solidarity with my case. And now when I speak I really do have a voice. I mean look, we are having an interview. I have been saying all this same stuff for years before I became the ‘Lone Wolf’ but you would never know it because, no one ever listened.
As far as strategy, of course I could have done better. Unfortunately HOW I could have, or WHAT I would have done different I cannot discuss. Due to my current situation as an imprisoned and monitored man.
PE: -Let’s talk about your life on the inside. How do you spend your days? Do you get paid to work? What are the costs you have to spend money on? You have and mp3 player, how does that work?
WALTER:– Here in the CMU it is a very small world. I live day after day, month after month and over a year now in a single prison unit completely segregated from the rest of the penitentiary of Marion. The day I get released from the CMU to the general population of the prison it will feel like I got a parole. I am allowed two 15 minute phone calls a week and no visits. Every person I have tried to have put on my visiting list has been rejected. I have not hugged, touched or physically seen anyone I care about since the day off my arrest in the summer of 2010.
A typical day goes something like this. I wake up about nine in the morning. I walk to the top of the range and sit down at a computer. I log in and see if I have any emails. All my incoming and outgoing email is screened by the counter terrorism unit in Virginia to make sure I am not sending or receiving coded messages. They also can reject or approve any incoming or out going emails before I have the chance to send or receive them. They can also block me from communicating with anyone they want and they have done this with three of my contacts. When that happens I cannot snail mail, email or make telephone calls to these people ever again. In short, all communication is cut off permanently, and without explanation.
After I am done on the computer I go ‘outside’ which is a rectangle walkway that surrounds an island of three ‘recreation’ cages. The sky is completely obscured by chain link fence and razor wire. I walk in rectangles until lunch. Lunch is usually beans, rice or the occasional veggie burger. The food is terrible and unhealthy. It is worse than any other institution I have ever been in. After I eat I go back to my cell and write responses to letters from supporters and friends. At noon, I go to mail call and get any mail, books or magazines that have come in that day. After mail I watch the soaps on Spanish TV. I like ‘Amorcita Corazon’. When my soaps are over I go out to the cages and do body weight exercises or shoot hoops. I come back up to my cell and lock down for four O’ clock stand up count, and then I nap until dinner. After dinner I walk for another hour. then I study Spanish for one to two hours, after which I slam a couple cups of black tea and go back to my cell to read, write and draw until about one in the morning, or until I fall asleep. Then I wake up and do it again.
As far as work goes, on the other side of the cell house opposite the rec. cages is a ramp and a patch of grass that leads to the chow hall. My job is to clean the walkway and cut the grass. I make twenty dollars a month but they take all of that for restitution and court costs I owe. So in reality I get paid nothing. But I get to go on the only patch of Earth that we have in the CMU and it’s ‘out of bounds’ for everyone else.
As far as cost of living, everything I have shoes, shorts, Vegan food, toothpaste, paper, stamps, envelopes, music, and email (yes, I get charged to send and receive email) Is only because of money supporters send me. Without support funds I would literally have nothing. Recently the entire federal prison system got mp3 players. They installed the hardware and software on the computers. Songs cost a dollar and a half each, no discount for purchasing whole releases. They have some good music. I have downloaded Earth Crisis, Chumbawamba, Jose Alfredo Jimenez, Augustin Lara, Napalm Death, Public Enemy and many, many more! With very little stimulation music is essential for mental health. I went overboard and spent all my money on music, which makes things tight for me but I don’t care I would rather listen to music than anything else in here.
The conversations and interactions I am subjected to in the CMU are repetitive and obsessive. There are the legal guys that just talk about law all day long, constantly and without end. There are the religious guys that just talk about god and scriptures and religious interpretation all day. And the institutionalized guys that just talk about every prison they have been at. Most of those guys have spent their entire lives in prison.
I quit talking to most people here because I don’t like to argue, it’s pointless and agitating. And outside of my circle of about 5 friends whose company I enjoy the rest of these guys can go flush themselves down the toilet, and go where ever the rest of the pieces of shit end up, for all I care!
I’ll tell you this, I still feel as hardcore about my beliefs as ever but I am completely over preaching to people that don’t want to hear them, protesting is different than proselytizing.
PE: – Recently you quit using the Muslim name you had been given. Have you completely given up on Islam? Religion altogether? Do you still maintain some type of spiritual beliefs?
WALTER: I am going to be honest about my feelings towards religion and much of what passes for spirituality. I don’t believe it. It’s a human shibboleth. Animals in a state of nature have no use for it and neither do I. I am part of something bigger than any religion, ‘god’ or hocus pocus, it’s called LIFE. When I die I will go back to the Earth. I will go back to where ALL life must, and I will not know where that is until the time comes and death is upon me.
I know god is not in books. I have read and studied most world religions and many obscure spiritualities. I have learned for certain that god is not in books. The only thing in books is words. The entire concept and production of a book is a human construct. It’s our way for the dead and absent to infect the thoughts and lives of the living, for good or ill.
I Got involved in Islam under adverse and incredible circumstances, which is the only way I would have gotten involved in any religion, let alone one so incredibly dogmatic. I won’t go into the entire sordid tale except to say that I once promised an old woman that meant the world to me that one day I would attempt, one day, to try and find god. And I gave it my all. Unfortunately, I do not make a very good submitter.
Did you know that the first time I was ever in trouble with the law was for breaking into a church and burning a huge pentacle star into the carpet directly in front of the preacher’s lectern? It was a Methodist church in a rich white neighborhood, across the street from the police station. I also have a 14 inch upside down crucifix for half of my tattoo sleeve. On that same sleeve I also have a tattoo of the pope, except this pope has goat horns and is standing in flames. All the things I love the most in life: face tattoos, sex, fire, Animals, music, Liberation and Veganism seem to all be completely against religion. Oh well, I guess that’s how ‘god’ made me!
When I got involved with religion it completely shifted my focus and the focus the movement around me. Everything started to become about my new name and beliefs etc. I didn’t like that. I remember one night I went to bed and it occurred to me that I hadn’t thought about Animal lib, Straight Edge or resistance all day, just religion. That was the beginning of the end for me. I didn’t like that feeling of assimilation, like the Borg on that sci fi show ‘Star Trek the Next Generation’. It was a calming feeling but also creepy. Next thing you know you have that glazed doughnut look in your eyes, the one that super religious people get. No thanks, I’m already off in the head enough without any help from the land of make believe!
I also got tired of reading all the terrible stuff about god hating gays and stoning people to death, or chopping off people’s hands for stealing. This crap is in all the so-called ‘holy books’ of various religions; right their in black and white print. And if you believe it then you have to do a bunch of mental gymnastics to somehow make it all not, horrible!
All this said, I did learn a lot about Islamophobia and I am completely against it! the media promotes Islam to be a terrorist religion and that is just not accurate. Every religion has violent fringe elements but we don’t paint all their followers as ‘terrorist’ or ‘extremist’. Look at those crazy evangelicals that drink poison or the ‘army of god’ psychopaths. Still the media doesn’t call them ‘Christian terrorists’. I learned along time ago that it’s not what people believe that makes them good or bad apples it’s the things they do and their capacitates for compassion, or cruelty. But as far as any more personal beliefs about ‘pie-in-the-sky-when-you-die’. I am a disbeliever, and will remain so.
PE: – About a year ago you put out a public statement saying you could no longer call yourself an anarchist, recently you have recanted, re-embracing anarchy. What was the reason for your change of heart? What brought you back to the dark side?
WALTER:– The reason with my disenchantment with anarchism was in reality a disenchantment with certain anarchists. I don’t like the concept of publicly battling with people and the spectacle it creates. It’s a mistake I have made in the past, and when I look back at those statements they just look egotistical and immature. That said, I will for the first time explain what was going on and what led up to not only that statement but also baseless rumors that have followed me since. I will be careful not to name drop or call anyone out, a courtesy that was not afforded to me by the anarcho-rumor mill.
At the time of my arrest in Colorado in the summer of 2010, the second letter I ever received was from a local anarchist group. They talked about supporting me and were even interested in being my official support team. Furthermore they had their own print shop. I was happy to have their support and planned to write extensively with them as the publishers. A visit was arranged and one of the collective came to visit me at the county jail in Golden. I was told by this person that there were rumors that I was an informant. I was taken back by this and said that ‘I was the only person on my case and no other arrests had been made so who exactly am I informing on?’ This person agreed, and from that moment support was forthcoming, for a whole four weeks anyways.
I gave my new support team my email address and password so that they could get another picture of me besides the mugshot the media had. I began writing articles about Animal Liberation from an anarchist perspective. I was calling the collective about twice a week. And then abruptly it all came to a screeching halt. Nothing I wrote ever got published or sent back to me. No one accepted my calls. No more visits. A couple weeks later I received a letter from the collective about some so called visit from my email account to a ‘homophobic YouTube video’. I was told I need to explain myself, defend myself and do it quick because ‘anarchists everywhere are calling to drop support for you’.
Words cannot describe how I felt. First I didn’t know what homophobic video they were talking about, and I still don’t. Second the only people that could be turning ‘anarchists everywhere’ against me were the self same people that were my support team, as I was newly arrested and they were the only anarchists I was in contact with. And third, I was not the only person with availability to that email. For all I know the FBI could have been in my email account trying to gather information or spread disinformation; which would make good sense from their end of things. In any event I have never to this day seen the homophobic YouTube video that was allegedly watched in connection with my email account. I haven’t seen it because it does not exist.
I was really pissed off about this for a couple of years because these rumors not only hurt elements of my support but also my feelings. Very, very few people know what it’s like to be in the position I was: In jail, on the news, facing federal prison as a ‘domestic terrorist’ and all the while using this as a platform to discuss Animal Liberation through my writings while facing rumors and tear down tactics from ‘anarchists’! I mean there I was in jail for being an ALF operative and I was being questioned as if I was a Nazi fascist in jail for queer bashing!
When people that do know me tried to post comments to this collectives website stating that I am in fact openly bi-sexual they would not post them. I know this because friends printed me those defenses and mailed them to me in jail along with printouts of their webpage and blogs showing what they were posting, the only comments they would let stand were the ones against me.
So after my court case was finished in Colorado I wrote that statement about not Identifying as an anarchist. I wrote that at a time when Animal Rights activists were being very supportive and at the same time I was getting a lot of accusative mail from anarchists primarily from the united states. It’s one thing when you don’t get along with a group of people in person you just hang out with others. But when you’re in imprisoned and people from several different states critique and sometimes ridicule you in letters there is a feeling of totality to it. So I thought, fine I will cut my losses with the anarchist community and stick with Animal Liberation and Straight Edge which is not hostile to me.
It must also be said that many anarchists such as yourself and the international anarchist community have unfailingly showed true support and solidarity since day one. Two things that have a profound effect on decision making is a lack of information and emotional distress. I have had my share of both since my arrest. But these days find me much more grounded and less erratic. Due in large part to being done with court and in the routine of my current surroundings. I am an anarchist, this has always been a foundation of who I am. Before I was the ALF lone wolf, before I was Straight Edge, before I was Vegan. I was an anarchist. I don’t have to drop one thing to become another. I am all this and more.
PE: – What would you say to people that have characterized you as ‘single issue’?
WALTER: Calling me or the ALF or the Animal Rights movement a ‘single issue’ cause is a little verbal slur that otherwise thinking and activist oriented people like to use on Vegans. Seriously, anyone that has read my book or the statements that I have been making from prison for years knows that I am concerned with more than one issue and I always have been.
But more importantly why the single issue snub when it comes to Animal Liberation?
I have personal met gay rights activists that act like the only thing wrong on the planet is that gay marriage isn’t recognized legally. I have never heard anyone tell them that their cause is less valid because it is a ‘single issue’. Factually it is incorrect to typecast Veganism or Animal Liberation in this way. A.R. issues have to do with several different species of life and often tie in with environmental concerns. Nearly every other Liberation struggle is only concerned with a fragment of one species, humans!
an old flyer Walter made years ago
To those people that equate me or Veganism to being a one hit wonder, I would challenge back: Fine then tell me exactly what you are doing to liberate all life, everywhere! The fact is Total Liberation is the connecting of many different issues and tactics, and Animal and Earth Lib are a big part of that. One need not give up movement autonomy to be valid under the umbrella of Total Lib. I am an Animal person. I love Animals! I am a Vegan activist. These are clearly compassionate and selfless pursuits.
of course not every group or individual is going to click but slighting the A.R. community as if we are going a different direction than Total Lib is messed up! We can point that finger anywhere. I know plenty of anarchists that think that anarchism is strictly a political ideology, or theoretical idea. Or what about independence struggles like my own Puerto Rican peoples struggle for independence from los Estatos Unidos? They are definitely very concerned with their own movement autonomy and the single issue of independence. People will always say whatever they feel and that is great but remember this, it’s harder to build others up than to tear them down.
A book collection of Walter Bond’s prison writing on veganism and animal liberation
Thank you Comrade for this interview. I really wanted to have the opportunity engage in a question and answer session that not only brought these critiques out into the open but one that also allowed me to lay it all on the table with nothing held back. And now my friend……I rest my case…. Take care and I will do the same.
Total Liberation, Whatever It May Take!
The fact that this starts with a mid-paced battle-hymn sing-a-long is pretty deceiving. Once track 2(A Love Radio) kicks in, your ears get blasted with an explosion of angsty barroom rock and roll! Track 4 slows down a bit. Maybe it’s to give you a breather and to make sure you don’t wreck the living room. After this they slowly build up tempo and take off full speed again by Sickness, track 6. RRB leave nothing to the listeners imagination while belting out jam after jam of nasty unapologetic grit rock complete with kick ass guitar solos. Every time I listen to this CD is gets better and better and the riffs seem to pop out more and the overall writing make more sense. It wouldn’t surprise me if Tesco Vee was a fan of these guys. Even though they’re from Regina, Saskatchewan I would swear they were based in Boston, Mass. Something about the attitude and energy, I dunno, maybe the back up gang vocals? Who knows. Anyway, the artwork is fairly minimal and there’s no lyric sheet, but it well done at the same time. And to round it out, the recording and production are super clean ,but in an analog sort of way. The sound is very large for a four piece. (Jake)
I threw threw this on during my drive home recently without ever having heard anything by these guys before and it couldn’t have been a better soundtrack. I live about 20 miles out of town in a heavily hilly and wooded area of Western New York. The trees are bare, with the exception of snow and/or ice and everything is calm, quiet and almost post apocalyptic. The cd starts with lush layers of beautiful guitar, playing clean and picking through chords creating a serene, but mildy oppressive atmosphere. Suddenly, distorted guitars tastefully kick in, but the mood isn’t altered. Things just get heavier. Vocals are minimal which creates an even more dramatic effect. They oddly fit, but seem like the vocalist may have been in a crust band at some point. Each song has a similar structure, but each as unique as the last. THRANENKIND is all about atmosphere, not blazing speed or brutality. They remind me a bit of WOLVES IN THE THRONE ROOM with out the black metal, but have a lot in common with CELESTIIAL, a “woodland doom” band from the Mid-Western U.S. Upon further investigation I found that these folks are very political and promote the vegan straightedge anarchist lifestyle. I love when political folks like these guys don’t play the expected musical style that fits their beliefs. There seem to be more and more Green Anarchist Black Metal bands popping up lately, which is awesome since I’m a huge black metal fan, but hate wading through all the sketchy bands to find the good ones. Not to mention that the production on this is perfect. No fake creepy wet dungeon recording. This is their first full length and this is a promo copy, so who knows if there will be any changes on the actual release. Oh, and my copy came with a little piece of what might be a fern in it. If you like slower atmospheric doom laden blackmetal done by people who give a shit, pick this up immediately. (Jake)
So we just wrapped up our tracking last week and now have Brad at Audiosiege in Portland doing the mix and I’ve gotta say…this is by far the best experience and sound we’ve ever had! We’re planning to do two separate albums with this session. Our first priority in releasing these tracks is to get our single out for the PE series that’s running this year. I believe we’re in line to be #7 and already have the art and title sorted out….but sorry, you gotta wait 😉
The next release is based on a mere concept we had some time back and will be a 4 song 12″ with a sort of back story. We’ve been really hitting the ground running as a band and feel that we not only want to write music, but we really want to put our minds and energy into something that’s not just “another record”. I’m not quite sure what that means, but after doing this for so many years, you really start to recognize how important the music can be and what kind of effect it has on yourself and others.
So, to say that we’ve just begun would be putting it lightly. Tons of ideas, and tons of support from all over. Cheers to the DIY community and everyone involved to make this place better by contributing in one way or another. Punk is a way to get a message and a feeling out to the world, and damn it feels good! Cheers
So I was sitting at the bar in my usual spot doing what I usually do…Slowly sip my Guinness and not talk to anyone. That’s not quite true, I’ve gotten to know a few people there now and we share greetings and some small talk. The owners are cool and make everyone feel really welcomed, they know everyone’s names and always work the crowd making the patrons feel at home. This isn’t a punk bar, its not a metal bar, it’s not even a hipster bar. This is a neighborhood bar that is home to some serious life long boozers. Even at 41 I am generally one of the youngest people in there and certainly the best looking! It’s great for my self-esteem! Anyways…Back to the story…
Like I was saying – I was sitting there doing my thing listening to the two dudes in the corner with the acoustic guitars rock out covers of Tom Petty and the Eagles between wise cracks and talk of pussy and boobs. Suddenly the all too familiar aroma of stomach chunder assaulted my senses. I looked to my right and there, right on the bar was the swirl of beer and fast food soup. The blower of beads had bailed. He did the Technicolor yawn and split (or so we thought). The bartender shrieked out and started yelling for the owner. “Mike!, Mike!…I need help!” The mad spitter had at least tried to contain it. He had tried to puke back into his shot glass! Obviously a shot glass does not hold much and it was totally lathered in creamy, acidic, gut swirl and it was all over the fucking place. Fucking BRU-TAL! Mike quickly came to the rescue and mopped it all up without even a complaint. Not soon after and the assailant returned from the pisser with a huge fuckin’ wad of toilet paper in his hand and even though Mike had already cleaned it all up this wasteoid started swabbing the deck with a mangled mass of shit paper. I was laughing like high school boy in sex ed class as this dimwit made a huge spitwad cocktail on the bar. He was apologizing profusely and saying he was never going to come in again. This is where I can really emphasis the coolness of the owner…He just reached out and shook the dudes hand. “Don’t worry about it. Forget about it. It never happened.” He continued to bro down with the human puke fountain and that was it. The dude left, still with his tail between his legs, but welcome to return. In just about any other bar in the world this idiot would have been drug outside, cursed out and told to fuck off dinner chunks and all.
My friend Nate puked a lot. Smells, stories of uncooked eggs, gory pictures…Just about anything that was a little bit unsettling to the senses could call forth an exclamation of Campbell’s Chunky from his digestive system. It got to the point where you could almost get him to puke on queue. And like many, the smell of vomit makes my stomach do The Twist. He knew this too, I can recall a particular afternoon when he was chasing me with a bucket of his spew and sure enough it conjured incantations from the pits of my stomach that belonged more in Hell than all over my shoes and shorts. Dick.
All this queasiness and for some reason another mans lung butter had no effect on him. Nate would spit lugies onto the ceiling, let them hang and then when gravity finally won out it would drop back into his waiting mouth. He and my buddy Joe got so they would catch each other’s! They even got this thing down where they stood across from each other, kind of like they were going to do an egg toss or something and spit lugies across the gap into each others waiting mouths! What the fuck chuck! That makes we want to do the Technicolor yawn just thinking about it.
When I met Nate he lived in the next town over and we were in high school, this was maybe ’87 or so. End of Story (EOS) were the local hardcore heroes with their eclectic blend of DRI meets DAG NASTY at a backyard half-pipe brand of thrash. There was this house next to the mall in Glenwood that they’d play parties at and like any good punk house it had a cool name (that has been robbed from my memory by Father Time) and after a good party/show was cleaned up by pushing a snow shovel to scoop up all the beer cans and bottles.
I was in the kitchen and Tim was on top of the refrigerator with his foot tall mohawk and tripping on acid and reading a comic book while the band raged on. Tim met some national notoriety when USA Today ran a national story of his fight against the Glenwood PD. He had been busted skating (this was the height of the ‘Skateboarding Is Not A Crime’ days) on the sidewalk and was fighting the city on it. There was a rad picture of him holding his skateboard while sporting his punk leather jacket, no shirt, and big mohawk. The funny thing was that when I came across this article I was in Pennsylvania at a Hotel on road trip with my parents back to New York. How fucken’ rad was it to find this story of small town rebellion delivered to us at our stay over with Howard Johnson. The weird thing is I can remember my Dad order spaghetti for breakfast that day. Why not? It was one of those 24/7 places and he loves spaghetti! Well anyway there was Tim in the national paper…I think it was all a bit of a set-up though because his Dad was a lawyer! Part of me thinks they just wanted to raise a ruckus and maybe get some attention. Whatever…Fuck the “Man”! Skateboarding is not a crime!
Well there was Tim and standing by the sink was this surfer dude Nate. He had it going on! He was a transplant from Southern California and had the build, haircut and look of surfer. Right off the bat we hit it off, he had a great personality. He was funny as shit and laughed at his own jokes all the time, kind of like Emilio Estevez did, especially in Young Guns. To use the clichéd line: he was the dude all the guys wanted to be and all the girls wanted to be with. The guy even had a tattoo when no one else did. He was fucken’ bad ass all the way and over the years we became really good friends.
We used to party in the woods a lot, they were close to town and the cops generally left us alone if got out of the city limits. There was this place called The Pit, it was kind of a…big pit in the ground. We’d start a fire in the “pit” that was naturally protected by the surrounding dirt walls. It was early evening, the sun was starting to drop behind Sunlight Mountain and shade was creeping across the valley. I was probably off taking a piss or something when I came across a deer head. It was most likely left by a hunter but now that I think about it had a rack…Don’t hunters usually save those? Here I was at a “woodsy” with a rotting deer head; it was as obvious to me then as it is to you now what I should do with it. Yup! I grabbed it by the antler and ran back into the party chasing everyone with this rotting, putrid, head. It was fucking vile. Writing this my mouth is starting to water with the warning signs of approaching puke…I played on Nate’s weak stomach and was duly rewarded with Nate’s cry of sour beer and curdled pizza cheese. I dropped the head laughing and ran off to re-fill my beer. Nate could have easily hunted me down and imposed the same punishment upon me but he upped the ante and threw the head in the fire evoking the cries of every person standing around that fire. As the rotten, flesh-dripping skull started to smolder and the wretched stench of decay and death circled around the mostly underage punks innocently sipping their Olympia’s it was as if one queue almost everyone started puking in unison! Oh how that foul, wicked, odor inflicted revenge for the dead causing everyone to hurl. That party was over before sundown.
Like most of us in the Valley of Broken Dreams our drinking and partying started reaching rock star levels and as the fun was fading as the trouble was setting in. Jail, beatings and even death started to make itself part of our scene and Nate was caught right in the middle of it.
Many of us were no longer partiers; we had graduated to becoming drunks and drug addicts laying the foundations of lifelong problems. Nate’s body wasn’t what it was and the girls didn’t hang around him like they once did. His face was taking on a new shape after a few beatings and his happy-go-lucky attitude was fading with stints in jail. On a very early morning the phone rang and I was the only who was apparently awoken by it. Nate was on the other line and was asking for a ride, he was at the hospital in Glenwood and needed someone to come get him. I don’t know whose car I took or how I found the keys but I cleared my head enough of the pervious nights debauchery to figure how to get to the hospital to pick up Nate.
He was fucked up. Mangled. Someone had beat him with a bat, pipe or other blunt object. It was disgusting. One or more people had broken into he and his roommate’s place that night and beat the living shit out of them. They were most likely left for dead and it was most likely over drugs. They both lived but Nate’s face got reorganized and his roommate got permanent brain damage. The Colorado Bureau of Investigation came to town and although the crime was never solved there are many theories out there and I am not going to mention any more of this in this column.
Things just got worse in the Valley as cocaine really dug it’s nails in deep. A lot of weird stuff starting happening that now I as I look back it seems like it was from a movie. It got to a point where I didn’t want to be there anymore. We weren’t having fun, it seemed like the clouds were low and there was a storm that just wouldn’t pass to let any sunlight in. Fatefully I got a phone call about playing a show with BLANKS 77 in Boulder to which I agreed. Problem was my band had just broken up due to that plaguing storm. A few phone calls later and I was moving to Denver to join a recently formed band that needed a vocalist called CLUSTERFUX.
It must have been the next summer, so maybe ’96, and I was back in the Valley for the Carbondale Mountain Fair. I saw Nate. There he was, outside the bar…”Hey bro, can you buy me a pitcher?” That was it, no greetings nothing of the sort. I hadn’t see this dude, one of my best friends, for 9 months and that’s all he could say. That’s why I left…That’s where we had gotten as a “scene”, and I only use that term to describe a group of people that hung out together…
Side note – To illustrate this point further I have another tale to tell. One day I had gotten off of work and I see a friend of mine walking down the street. He says “He did you hear about Adam? He died last night, rolled his car, it decapitated him…But we still have half a keg left and we are going to drink it later if you’re in”. What?!! Adam was this dudes best friend! Some of this had to be shock, and people mourn differently but…What the fuck? I declined and went home.
Back to Nate…Ok, so he just asked me for a pitcher of beer as he is standing there on the sidewalk in July in snowboots, plaid golf pants from the second hand store, no shirt and literally a rope belt, trembling in need of alcohol. I asked him about his shoes, he said those were the only ones he had. I asked about his shirt, he said he couldn’t find it. “It”?? I declined on the beer and went about my business.
A few months later Nate was in Denver to hang out and party for a show. He was drunk as a skunk at the show and starting shit with everyone. He was being an asshole and I guess eventually someone kicked the crap out of him. We couldn’t find him after the show and we all went back to my place to party, but still no Nate. Finally the next day he showed up with his jaw wired shut, someone broke the fuckin’ guys jaw!!! Damn! At least he could suck beer through a straw…
Like I said, he really started to change physically. Not just the loss of muscle tone but even more noticeable was his face. The booze not only wreaked havoc on it but all the beatings from being a drunk-ass were really transforming his facial alignment. On another trip back to Carbondale I was at a show and there was this dude that kept like gesturing to me. When I walked by he’d say “Hi” but I nod and keep moving. I didn’t know this was, just some friendly partier I guess. Turns out it was Nate, he was so disfigured I didn’t even recognize him and he was just socially inept. His brain wasn’t really sharp enough to have normal social skills, he was a drunk.
I never saw him again. I heard he had moved in a with this dude he knew that had some money and a house and wanted to give Nate a chance to get his shit together. This started to work and Nate reached out to his Mom for help so he could go to re-hab. He relocated to Phoenix to clean-up (I guess Phoenix is a re-had destination…I have another friend that moved there to clean up too). Apparently Nate was getting better and had landed a job. He was killed in a work accident. A crane dropped a pallet on him…
Life was weird back then. Horrifically Nate’s story isn’t a one-off situation. There was a lot more death yet to come out of that group of friends. When the fun stopped and the hell started we were all too self-involved to care for one another or too fucked up to notice. We were all wrestling with our own demons and some lost it all. Life is fragile and precious, so are friendships. Woulda’, coulda’, shoulda’…We cant change the past but we can seize the present. Who amongst your friends are suffering? Who could use your friendship, your shoulder your wisdom? Look out for each other…PEACE
End Notes:
My band, APEX (member of CLUSTERFUX) changed our name to ROÄC. We have an album that is almost done. It kicks ass! Follow us out here: ROÄC
I’ve been doing a podcast with my homie and we cover all kinds of out there shit. From your basic “conspiracies” to aliens and simulation theory, to any sort of outlandish shit. We don’t know everything so we don’t try to force our opinions as fact, we just discuss the topics and offer different perspectives. It’s fun…Follow us here: Flow With the Go! Or check out http://flowwiththego.net/
I just saw AGENT ORANGE play in what used to be my elementary school’s gym / cafeteria. That was weird. They were boring but seeing old friends was great and drinking beer in the elementary school while watching a punk band seemed like a good middle finger to the establishment. Especially old teacher that used to fuck with us.
Hey I got a ditro/ebay store going. I add new stuff weekly. Check it out!
HARRINGTON SAINTS have been around since 2005 and Pride and Tradition is their second full-length album and is produced by Lars Frederiksen from RANCID and he did a great job on it. The production is nice and clear, but gritty enough to keep the edge that this band has. Eleven tracks planted firmly in the vein of Oi and Street Punk that made me want to grab a pint, start jumping around and learn the words to shout along with on this album. You get lyrics about class warfare, getting screwed over by those rich bastards, lots of frustration, and about giving up and just rotting on the couch. This has a lot of touches of classic Oi bands, but still keeps things going without being slavishly bound to their influences. As soon as I put this album on, it just started being on of the better Street Punk and Oi albums that I’ve had the pleasure to listen to in a long time. Such great guitar leads, nice and meaty, rocking bass, the drums just going for broke, the gang vocals that would sound awesome shouted out while driving and the slightly gruff vocals really made this a great album. I now must own all of their music…damn you Californians! This is going into the collection of those that will get played a lot, a whole fucking lot! (Rick Ecker)
This is one pissed off band! The good thing is that they aren’t just ranting on here, but giving you information about things, like police and political oppression and suppression in “Gestapo! Gestapo!”, and about the food we eat in “Monsato’s Daughter”. It reminds me of the political anarcho punk rock and hardcore from the 1980s with the straight forward hardcore and the angry, but highly intelligent lyrics trying to get their message across. It brought me right back to when I was in high school and this was the type of stuff that my friends and I listened to a lot of. There are seven songs on here with only one breaking the two-minute mark, so they don’t beat around the bush, but they would if he was still in power I bet. Some great playing, great guitar playing with lots of power and nice leads, the bass is nice and rumbling through the songs, the drumming is almost out of control, and the singing is gruff with the back ground vocals a nice touch. This could totally fit in with the classics from the 1980s, and this just fucking kicks ass in every way, lyrically, and musically and you need to get this one! (Rick Ecker)